
As consequence of recent regime change in the U.S.A it has become more difficult for travelers from afar to enter their country. Currently Canadians don’t need to fill out an ESTA form, but as a show of good faith to our paranoid American cousins I’m going to throw my trustable bonifides up for public consumption, to avoid being placed on any unfortunate lists. All statements are legitimately true with limited artistic embellishment.
ESTA-REGISTRATION FORM
General Information
Title : Viscount
Family Name : Valliant
First Name: Allan Jason George
Are you known by any other names or aliases ? (optional*): Pistachio, Frambojan, Creepy Mexican Guy on a bike, Ahmed Jamal, Alejandro Jesus, Richard Vanion, Slap Dandy, Buttons Delacroix, Robert Elliot, Scrote Totem, Da Realest.
Date of Birth: June 25 1976
City of birth : Ottawa
Country of birth : Canada
Gender : Male
Marital status: Essential married. I could leave town if I wanted to, but I feel like we’ve been together long enough that it should count.
Details about your health and your character
8th Level Personal Trainer
STR: 14 INT:15 WIS:4 DEX:11 CON:13 CHR:15
HP: 45
Continue reading →